Into the Wardrobe

Hi Steve,

My own approach to people who are angry or in pain, is usually to affirm their feelings rather than to expect them to get over it or learn from it immediately or to insist that their suffering is God's will. Though I hear horror stories about things that people have experienced at the hands of their church and clergy persons, I haven't seen callousness like this at first hand, very often. The real gift at such times is presence -- to be with someone in suffering -- often saying nothing or merely holding them and weeping with those who mourn.

A way down the road, when people have begun to heal from their tragedies is perhaps the time to get more philosophical, or when someone shows no sign of progression on the road to recovery.

Melodee

I have done CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education), but I know what you mean by people busting into tears on you. It happens to me all the time, too. :)

When I'm experiencing pain, I usually do not bother praying to thank God or anything else for that matter. I get the proverbial "locked and double-locked door" Lewis spoke about in A Grief Observed. So I consider it a waste to speak into nothingness.

And I agree with the statement above that philosophical discussion should be withheld until at least there is some healing of the wounds inflicted.

Perhaps that is why God is so silent in our pain. He knows that no explanation will pacify us and therefore He remains silent. Until we are condusive to help, and not merely wanting to ascribe blame to Him, He will not even offer help.

Don't believe me? Notice God never offered Job an explanation, but basically said, "Hey Job, you know that list of things that men cannot comprehend that's in my files? The reasons behind your suffering are on that list." And then proved his point bys asking Job a bunch more questions based on more things on that list.