Thanks Karen. I think that expresses my biggest concern. (Although I don't know what a "muffin top" is.)
I'd add that honoring your neighbor is a basis for honoring God.
On drawing attention to oneself - dressing in a way that is significantly different from that of the people you've come to worship with, supposedly as part of a corporate body: You seem to use the term "dress code" to indicate a highly specific and Pharisaical list of requirements. I've been talking about that which is normative to specific cultural understandings - ie, at a beach party, you dress down - T-shirts and shorts are normative. At a funeral, full shirts, ties and slacks (for men) are normative, etc...
It is being individualist - "non-conforming" - that is, generally speaking, out of place in corporate worship. In standing out, you are saying, "Look at me!" rather than "Look at God!"
In business , they tell you to "dress for success", and that your outer dress reflects your attitude, your inner state (what is 'in the heart'). How is this so in business, and yet not so in church?
On American vs Russian Orthodoxy - the only significant difference is a tendency to greater laxness in America regarding head coverings for women. This, in complete opposition to the Eucharist, which is dogma, falls under local cultural practices, which do vary, without any variation in dogma. That's why the Orthodox Church seems splintered if you look at an American telephone book, but in fact they are all fully united in doctrine. Personally, I do think, though, that there is a level of respect in the cultural practice, and that the American tendency is a result of the excessive individualism and feminism in the national culture - things that the Church will gradually cure you of if you let it. In both countries there are large numbers of new converts to Orthodoxy. The trouble in America, is that unlike Russia, where there was always a tradition of head coverings, there was no such tradition - it had long been abandoned by most Protestants who did have one.
And on personal conviction, I would ultimately (and cautiously) agree. It's not our business to judge others. We don't know
what's going on in their lives. But when we get to that point, we realize that we don't want to be distracting others by standing out excessively - we want them to be looking at God, too, and not our bodies, butts, bosoms, fancy hats, over the top Armani suits or conversely, ragged and torn clothing. IOW, apply that "dress code" to yourself, and not to others as much as humanly possible. One example - an attractive woman with a body fitting outfit is standing right in front of you in the Confessional line (a time when there may not be any chanting/prayers going on). Turn your face to an icon and pray the Jesus prayer ("Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner") as many times as necessary. (Hopefully the woman in question will someday get a personal conviction to dress the way
she ought to in church...) I'm sure you can supply appropriate Protestant examples...
"Eh? Two views? There are a dozen views about everything until you know the answer. Then there's never more than one."
Bill "The Blizzard" Hingest - That Hideous Strength